Thursday, September 27, 2012

UGH! Look how FAT you are!!

Let me just say that I only write in this blog anymore when the feeling really hits me and tonight the feeling was overwhelming. 
 
I just got home from a meeting and made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with exactly 2 tablespoons of peanut butter on it and a half tablespoon of jelly. Then I counted out 15 chips and put it on my plate. I say this for a reason.
 
 I plopped my butt down on the couch for a moment and happened to see part of tonight's X Factor. I saw a guy in a wheel chair and I turned up the volume. The show shared some of his story. He is in his early 40's and used to weigh over 900 pounds. He now weighs a little over 500. He has lost his weight he said by diet and exercise. He wanted to be there competing because he said he had been homebound for so long that the world has never been able to hear his voice. He still cannot stand because of his weight so they wheeled him up on stage and then he sang....
 
Let me tell you, when he began to sing, my eyes welled up and then I began to cry like a big ole baby. Why??? I was even asking myself that. I mean my eyes well up ALL the time but I began to cry and cry. So much so that when I sucked in some air I began to choke on the powdery cheese from my Cheetos.  I had so many things going through my head. I felt really bad for him and his circumstances...I felt mesmerized by his absolute beautiful voice...I felt so much joy for him that he was no longer homebound...the world was getting hear his voice for the first time...and I felt terrible sadness because obesity is such a problem and there are SOOO many people suffering from it. And then I began to think. I know..right?...just hang with me here.
 
Obesity is such a problem and most everyone associates it to being very lazy. However, I do not. I believe that laziness usually creeps in later, but over eating starts out for sooo many more reasons, just as drug addiction, cigarette addiction, sex addiction, gambling addiction, shopping addiction, alcohol addiction etc. These are things people do to fill a void! The sad thing about an eating addiction is that it is far less easier to hide than any of the others.
 
When you over eat people know it and if you are heavy people can be very mean. I have seen people look at obese people with disgust and sometimes even anger. ESPECIALLY when I see people going around Walmart sitting on one of their automatic carts. You can see the hatred in peoples eyes. Heck, if you have a shopping addiction the world can't see how much debt you are in when they look at you. You  may be beautiful and look like you got it all together on the outside but maybe you are a prescription pill popper with a problem or maybe you don't have a dime to your name because you just gambled your last check away. You may need to drink alcohol every single day but you keep it together enough that no one can really tell. Well, not the same for a food addict. They are judged the second they are seen.
 
I believe that in this country, people are becoming more prejudice with overweight people than people of a different color skin...I really do. And I would just like to say.... the next time you immediately judge the next obese person you see...think of them as a human being that has been trying to use food to replace something in their life just like you have been using or have used something detrimental in your life to replace something that you need. Don't look down in disgust at people sitting in the automatic carts at Walmart. They have become that way for reasons you could not even begin to fathom. It is not about measuring your food or counting out your chips....exercising a little more or about being less lazy. There is something that has led that person to the point where they are at and we should show grace and mercy to them just as God shows grace and mercy to us. It is so difficult to lose even 10 pounds. Can you imagine how difficult it would be if you had hundreds to lose. Show love. 
 
I may not be obese but how dare I ever pass judgement.  I know there are things that ALL of us have done that we are not proud of to fill certain voids in our lives. Unfortunately we can just hide ours better than someone who uses food.
 
Thanks for listening....
 
God gives us HOPE when there seems to be none. ~ Libby
 
 

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